Thanksgiving is supposed to be a time spent with your loved ones.
But one man has gone viral after taking the bold decision to leave his fiancée at home and spend the holiday alone with his family. More surprising still, it’s a decision the internet appears to have wholeheartedly endorsed.
Writing in a post shared to Reddit’s “Am I The A**hole” subreddit, which has been upvoted 10.900 times, the man explained how he and his fiancée have been together for three years in a long-distance relationship. She had been due to spend her first Thanksgiving with his family this year. However, a problem arose when it came to the food being served.
According to the post, his fiancée agreed to go but told him she would bring “her own cooked food with her.” The response left him confused, especially as she is not vegan or allergic to anything and had never eaten any of his mom’s food before.
“She said that is just her choice and wanted to eat something else to add new flavor for [T]hanksgiving since she was always forced to eat the same old traditional meals every year by her family,” he wrote.
He was keen to stress that she was planning to bring an “entire cooked meal” for herself rather than “food to share.”
Angry at her stipulation, the man branded his fiancée “disrespectful” but she told him it was better than telling his mom to “cook other dishes specifically for her.”
“I told her no she can not bring food with her and if she insists then she needs to stay home and not come with me because I’m not about to let her offend my mom’s cooking,” he wrote.
At that point, his partner became emotional, crying and accusing him of being “controlling” and “overreacting” about it. She told him she “wasn’t willing to go hungry” to please his mom.
The man stood his ground though, getting in his car and driving off to his parents’ house several hours away. As he left, he said she began calling him and telling him he was “wrong” to make this his “hill to die on” and blamed him for “causing her to miss” his mom’s invite.
Since arriving at his parents’ house, the man said he has been bombarded with messages from his fiancée “guilting” him for leaving her behind and calling him a “selfish jerk.”
A majority of commenters backed his hard-line stance when it came to his mom’s cooking. “It would have been perfectly acceptable (gracious even) for her to bring a side dish (or two),” Pbc85 commented. “But to pre-cook and bring her whole meal, and not eat your mother’s food at all, is rude.”
IcedExplosion wasn’t buying her reasoning, branding it “ridiculous.”
“She is refusing to eat [T]hanksgiving food because… she always eats the same traditional food once a calendar year? One day out of the year and this is the only day she suddenly needs to try a new food?” they asked.
“I am a picky eater and I would choke down a meal made up of a list of my least favorite foods before I would walk in with a single serving meal for myself and myself alone on a holiday centered around food.”
Definitelynotjava thought it seemed like a “power play” on her part. “Look I can show up and not touch your food and your son won’t say anything. Except he refused to play stupid games which wasn’t the plan,” they wrote.
AppropriateAd8488 said “She has 364 other days in a year to eat something different , for one day she can suck it up,” while GreekAmericanDom warned “This feels like a test to force you to choose her over your family.”
Despite the widespread criticism, a small faction suggested the fiancée may have valid reasons for wanting to eat her own food. Giveyokoachance was among those to suggest she could be “hiding an eating disorder.”
“When my eating disorder was bad, the idea of eating food that I didn’t know the nutritional facts of and hadn’t portioned out/weighed would send me into a panic.”
The theory certainly paints her reasoning in a new light and further highlights what is a major issue for a significant proportion of Americans.
According to a report from the Harvard School of Public Health published in 2020, 9 percent of the U.S. population will have an eating disorder at one point in their lifetime. That equates to 28.8 million Americans.
Some 10,200 people die in the U.S. every year as a result of an eating disorder—which equates to one death every 52 minutes—while the economic cost of eating disorders is $64.7 billion every year.
Earlier this week another viral Reddit post highlighted the ongoing issues around body dysmorphia in the U.S. after a teenager was left distraught when her aunt edited pictures of her on social media to make her appear slimmer.
On the flip side, a husband sparked fury after criticizing his wife for eating less following weight loss surgery.