Internet Backs Man Outing ‘Homophobic’ Parents After They ‘Disowned’ Him

A man has received mass-agreeance online after sharing that his family blame him for causing a family fight after he told his niece that her grandparents shunned him for his sexuality.

The anonymous 28-year-old man gained over 17,000 votes online after posting to the popular Subreddit “Upsetting Family Drama.”

Asking the ever-used “am i the a**hole” question, he detailed that his parents disowned him after he came out as gay. “AITA for telling my niece her grandparents are homophobic?” he asked.

Although he is no longer in contact with them, he still sees his sister and 10-year-old niece, who are both in contact with his parents too.

“Every year, my parents host a big Christmas gathering. I’m never invited, but my sister and niece always go. A day or two after that, we do a smaller Christmas with just me, my sister, and my niece,” he wrote.

“At our smaller Christmas gathering, while my sister was in the other room, my niece asked why I never go to my parents’ Christmas. I replied with the excuse I’ve used for years: I had to work.”

His niece, however, didn’t quite believe it this time, and questioned why he would be working if it was Christmas Day. After becoming upset, she asked if he actually liked to be with her and his sister.

“If she hadn’t said that, I probably wouldn’t have told her,” he confessed. “But I can’t stand the idea that she would think I chose not to go to Christmas. So, in a calm voice, I said ‘well, you know how I date boys instead of girls? Grandma and Grandpa don’t like that, so they ask me not to go to Christmas.’

“My niece was obviously upset by this. The next day, she called her grandparents and asked how dare they tell me not to come to Christmas. Apparently she was really harsh with them. Then, my parents called my sister and yelled at her for letting my niece around me.”

According to the poster, his sister was left angry at him for “causing the family fight and involving my niece in it.”

The man’s family issues are far from rare in the LGBTQ+ community, with a Stonewall and YouGov report finding that only 46 percent of lesbian, gay and bi people feel able to open up about their sexuality with everyone in their family.

Despite the Reddit user’s self-doubts, the response to his situation was unanimous—he was not in the wrong. Instead, users rushed to decipher which family member was instead.

“You were honest with your niece in an age-appropriate, non-confrontational way. The only reason it turned into a huge fight is because no one else had been honest with her before about the situation,” supported one user.

“If they didn’t want their granddaughter to know that they’re homophobic, they shouldn’t be homophobic. Simple as that,” added another.

One user reasoned that despite not being in the wrong, he should have informed his sister beforehand: “Your only mistake here was not informing your sister of the conversation you had with her daughter. I mean you dropped a big family detail on a 10-year-old and then just left.”

Attention on the popular post turned towards the man’s sister, with many criticizing her part in the saga. One user noted: “Your sister is a coward. The reason why it is so easy for your family to exclude you is because there is NO consequence on their end.”

While others took a positive response directed to the niece instead, writing: “Can I just say your niece is wonderful.

“She saw something she didn’t like, had the courage and trust to speak to someone she cared about about her feelings. She didn’t play games, went to the source, and found the problem. Then she addressed the problem at its source, her grandparents.

“She literally followed the line of trauma to where it was perpetuated and then went to it and said this isn’t ok. I hope after the initial shock blows over that your grandparents can re-evaluate their views, or at least set them aside for the greater good, which is their granddaughter.

“I hope you are super proud of her, because I am. She’s a gem.”

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