A woman’s Reddit post about making her co-worker cry after repeated jabs about her husband’s sincerity was met with support.
The woman, 28, who goes by the username “Routine-Hat-4545,” posted, “AITA for snapping at my co-worker and bringing up the state of her marriage?” in the “Am I The A**Hole” forum. It has been upvoted over 11,600 times.
She explained that she has been at her job for five years and has been married to her 30-year-old husband for the same timespan. The husband, a florist, has sent her small flower arrangements—such as three roses or baby breath—every Monday since she began working there, aside from the work-from-home days during the pandemic.
The woman, who never specified where she worked or the background of the company, keeps her floral gifts in a small vase on her desk.
Recently, she said, a new co-worker joined her company and asked whether the flowers on her desk were due to a special occasion. When another co-worker mentioned that the woman’s husband sends her flowers weekly, the new employee “made a face and changed the subject.”
But negative comments purportedly kept coming each Monday when the receptionist gave the Reddit poster her flowers, such as “Well, we can’t all afford to waste our money on stuff like that” or “Don’t you think that’s a bit tacky?”
The poster said she never entertained the new worker’s jabs. But one day it went too far, she said, when the co-worker reportedly said, “I think your hubby is overcompensating, are you sure he doesn’t have a mistress?”
“I was pissed,” the poster said, “and I said, ‘Well, some of us love our spouses and like to show it. Not all of us are staying in a toxic relationship for the sake of keeping appearances.’ Which was a low blow, since I knew that she was having trouble with her husband.”
The co-worker sobbed and left work in tears. While her other co-workers supported her and praised her for patience, the poster still 3wondered whether she was in the wrong for lashing out.
The poster later added that she knew the new co-worker was having relationship problems because she was allegedly “complaining about her husband since day one” to others in the workplace.
Yet the majority of Redditors were on the poster’s side. Some called the new co-worker “jealous” and “mean,” while others brought up how receiving weekly flower arrangements from a spouse who is a florist doesn’t have much to do with money or finances.
“Why is it people who make terrible comments and try to bully others, cry and get mad when someone finally tells them off?” one user said. “You did nothing wrong, she continued her snotty jobs for ages until she finally insinuated your husband was a cheater.”
Others wondered whether the comment, even said in jest, could land the poster in hot water with human resources in the workplace.
“I wonder though if this response could get OP in trouble,” one Redditor said. “I probs would’ve kept a little more professional but still biting edge with ‘thanks for your concern but no, he just has a flower shop and a happy wife’ and let co-worker be embarrassed by her own lack of professionalism.”
One user who identified themselves as an HR staffer said in a situation like this, they would interview both employees “and the person who continuously bothered/harassed the other would have the book thrown at them.”
According to NetSuite data from 2021, 47 percent of HR teams cited employee retention and turnover as their biggest challenge. More specifically, job characteristics and work environment—at 81 and 53 percent, respectively—were identified as the two biggest reasons for employees leaving their jobs.
The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy reported that about 15 percent of married women and 25 percent of married men have had extramarital affairs. It occurs about 20 percent more often “when emotional and sexual relationships without intercourse are included.”
Newsweek reached out to Routine-Hat-4545 for comment.