Relationships take work — especially if you’re living with a parent whose choices you don’t agree with. In a now-viral Reddit post, a user by the name of Merseymoys posed a dilemma in the forum, “Am I the A**hole (AITA),” and commenters didn’t hold back from their thoughts.
“I’m 16F and my 45yo dad has this habit of dating college age women and dumping them after like 2 or 3 years then complaining about how needy and clingy they were. It’s been going on my entire life and it really annoys me, like I feel like if he doesn’t want someone clingy, a woman in her early 20s willing to date a guy who could be her dad maybe isn’t the best option. It’s seriously like he’s allergic to any woman over 23,” the teen wrote.
She said she’s “made half-jokey comments before about how I think it’s creepy he only dates women 24,” adding that she lives with him full-time and thinks it’s her business to say something due to her father’s complaints about the women.
“Anyway so about a week ago he introduced his new gf to me, and she’s 21 but could easily pass for my age,” she wrote. “Like she wouldn’t be out of place in my high school. Idk it really bothered me in particular that day so when my dad wasn’t around I told her that if she’s looking for a long term thing, she won’t get it from my dad because he’ll definitely dump her before she turns 24 like every single other woman he’s ever dated and then he’ll call her a pathetic clingy mess behind her back.”
She continued: “I didn’t think she believed me, because at the time she laughed it off and said it was different with her, but I guess she thought about it and she ended up dumping him yesterday and must have told my dad what I said, cos now he’s angry at me for interfering in his relationship. He also says he’s hurt that I think of him that way, even though literally all I did was tell the truth, and I think if he doesn’t wanna be thought of that way he should stop being like that.”
A Finnish study of nearly 2,700 adults between the ages of 18 and 50 were asked the lowest age they’d consider as a sex partner. Per CBS News, the women’s youngest age preference at 27. The men stated they’s consider a partner as young as 21. Naturally, the internet weighed in with thoughts on the situation.
“NTA. You told the truth. If he’s offended by it, perhaps he should change his behavior,” NUT-me-SHELL said in a comment with more than 10,000 upvotes.
“‘I can’t believe you told them the truth instead of lying because we’re family!’ Also your dad is a Grade-A creep, OP. Jesus Christ, if I saw any of my friends dating someone that old, I’d hold an intervention,” KanishkT123 wrote.
“op needs to watch out for her friends, he will be creeping on them very soon if he isn’t already,” coolbeenz68 said.
Kathrynlena added, “OP also did that girl a HUGE favor—saved her three years of her youth that would’ve inevitably ended in trauma. NTA and I wish I’d been as wise as your dad’s ex and listened to the people who were honest with me about my terrible relationship when I was 21.”
“Well and if it’s always before 24 then it’s definitely the creepy ‘I keep getting older and the girls stay the same age’ vibe which is gross,” ijustcantwithit wrote.
And, as many other echoed, “At 24 they will be finishing their studies and starting a career. I have heard of men like OPs Dad and the idea of an independent woman – or worse a successful one- absolutely threatens them,” ohno_spaghetti_o said.